Kinker Korner’s Top 35 Movies Of 1987 NSFW

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Well the we’re nearing the end of the decade and things are hotting up. Let’s see what 1987 has in store for us.

 

35. Mannequin

Shout out to my old family friend/sometime babysitter Nicola Donaldson who would watch this pretty much every time she looked after me so it was ingrained into my brain. To be fair I always made her watch Batman Returns so it was a compromise. It’s a weird science kinda thing where a guy falls in love with a mannequin played by Kim Cattrall (typecast) and she comes to life. It’s weird but fun. Oh and….WE CAN BUILD THIS THING TOGETHER, STANDING STRONG FOREVER…..

Best Bit- Coming to life

 

34. Fatal Attraction

It’s not often that erotic thrillers are given so much plaudits that it leads to Academy Award nominations but this one got several. I’m sure you’re well aware but for those who aren’t this film is where the term “bunny boiler” comes from about a slighted ex who goes insane. Michael Douglas stars as a married man who has a weekend affair with a woman played by Glenn Close. She refuses to let it end and stalks his family in increasingly unhinged ways. A fantastic performance from Close.

Best Bit-  Wrist slit

 

33. The Witches Of Eastwick

A comedy come dark fantasy movie based on the 1984 novel by John Updike about three depressed women who are unaware they are witches and that their weekly meet ups are forming a coven. Everything goes nuts when a mysterious man played by Jack Nicholson arrives in town. It was directed by the immensely versatile George Miller who proves he can nail any style of movie with aplomb. The female leads of Cher, Michelle Pfeiffer and Susan Sarandon are great and this may have been the one that started my massive childhood crush on Pfeiffer…..then Batman Returns came along and it went into overdrive.

Best Bit- The devil comes to town

 

32. Dirty Dancing

Oh shut up it’s a fine movie!. Well I don’t need to explain this one much do I?. A romantic drama about a man who ….grinds on a young girl and…..oh god this is weird looking back. Probably the late Patrick Swayze’s defining movie and his chemistry with Jennifer Grey is great considering they famously didn’t get on at all during filming. The soundtrack is banging too…apart from Time Of My Life which is shite so stop listening to it!.

Best bit- Final dance

 

31. Rampage

A taught crime thriller from William Friedkin, the director of The Exorcist and The French Connection. It stars Michael Biehn and explores insanity and the motives of a serial killer. Friedkin wasn’t happy with the final result of the movie but it remains one of his more popular cult movies among fans.

Best Bit- Cop killer

 

30. A Chinese Ghost Story

The horror romantic comedy (horromcom?) that started a genre.A mix of martial arts, sword play historical drama horror, romance and spirituality makes for a hell of an adventure. A rollicking good time.

Best Bit- Cloak full of heads

 

29. Empire Of The Sun

SINCE FIFTEEN HUNDRED AND SIXTEEN,MINDS ATTACKED AND OVERSEEN. Ahem, little shout out to RATM fans. A war drama directed by Spielberg and based on the book by J. G Ballard that served as a semi autobiography. It stars a young Christian Bale as a British boy from wealthy family of expats in China who becomes a prisoner of war in Japan during the second world war. Beautifully shot.

Best Bit- Atomic bomb

 

28. The Princess Bride

Rob Reiner’s massively popular fairy tale fantasy based on the 1973 novel is up there in many people’s lists of favourite movies ever. Obviously that’s not the case with me such is it’s place on the list but it’s still a enjoyable movie. It was always “That movie with Andre The Giant in it” when I was young but yea it’s a lot of fun and fantastical as fairy takes should be.

Best Bit- Torture device

 

 

27.Project A Part 2

The sequel to one of the greatest martial arts action movies of all time is still incredibly entertaining with some insane stunt work but it falls short of the original. That is by no means anything to be ashamed of though and it’s still an enthralling and hugely entertaining thrill ride. Sammo Hung is notable by this absence but in come Maggie Cheung and Rosamun Kwan who do a good job in their roles.

Best Bit- Construction site fight

 

26. Broadcast News

I get the feeling if I had been an adult or in my late teens when I first saw this it would end up much higher on the list and although I enjoyed it when it when I was young a lot of it went over my head. I love James. L. Brooks and Albert Brooks and appreciate their subtlety so much these days so yea. Either way Broadcast news is a cracking comedy about a news station and the characters within. The awesome Holly Hunter is ace in it too. Brooks is the master of the sentimental comedy without making it manipulative and dumbed down.

Best Bit- 

 

25. Bad Taste

Who would have known from this debut, a splatterpunk extravaganza of disgust and visceral gore, that Peter Jackson would go on to become one of the biggest mainstream draws in movies?. An outrageously disgusting brainchild of Jackson who did a lot of the practical effects, produced, directed, starred in and wrote it all. Some boy is our Pete, love his splatterpunk phase. If you ever want to see Jackson flying kick someone here is your chance.

Best Bit- Head slice

 

24. Good Morning Vietnam

A movie loudly quoted by idiots forevermore (beautifully parodied in The Office) but a heartwarming and uplifting film nonetheless. Robin Williams plays a dj on a frequency aimed at soldiers in Vietnam who love him but his unconventional personality and style drives his uppers nuts and they try to change him. It’s a good vehicle for Williams’ sometimes annoying over the top performance and in this case it works well. Another that my dad loved.

Best Bit- First broadcast

 

23. Creepshow 2

A sequel to the excellent anthology movie that saw George Romero adapting short stories by Stephen King into screenplays. This one has three more tales including King’s excellent “The Raft” from his first short collection “Night Shift” and it’s a belter in movie form too. The other stories told here are Old Chief Wood’nhead and The Hitch-hiker.

Best Bit- The end of The Raft

 

22. Spaceballs

Recently I made the cardinal sin of going back and watching this movie despite that the fact I just knew it wouldn’t hold up well and it would probably destroy my memory of it from when I was a kid……Well it certainly hasn’t held up well and a lot of the humour I laughed at so much at as a kid had me rolling my eyes like a disproving librarian. I’ve become what I hate!. AH well I’ll always give it props for giving me hours of entertainment when I was a kid and Star Wars obsessed. I loved it and although I won’t be watching it again I’m not going to discredit what it meant to me as a kid. 

Best Bit- Ludicrous speed

 

21. Hamburger Hill

A really underrated Vietnam war movie that, much like Platoon and Apocalypse Now doesn’t portray the American soldiers as heroes saving the day. Instead they are shown as naive and well meaning soldiers who have been tricked into a horrendous position by their government and are absolutely annihilated in the real life and awful battle that saw them up against insurmountable odds. It also deals with the reaction to soldiers who find out about the college protests and the feeling that the soldiers were barbaric killers. It just shows how sad the whole situation was and continues to be when governments send young people to die over their squabbles.

Best Bit- Friendly fire

 

20. Angel Heart

Mickey Rourke plays a cop sent to New Orleans to find a missing man and finds himself caught in the middle of occult murders way worse than anything he’s ever seen before. A neo noir horror that’s darker than dark and suitably gritty with bleak and somewhat nihilistic direction from Alan Parker.

Best Bit- Louis Cypher revelation

 

 

19. Wicked City

 A dark fantasy from my preferred days of anime when it had serious balls and tried out there things and pushed boundaries at times. Not to say that never happens now but I feel there is a lot of pandering and dumbing down in mainstream anime these days. ANIME FANS KILLED ANIME!. Ahem, anyway this nasty little slice of horror comes from the director of the immensely popular Ninja Scroll and it shows with his slick animation and striking set pieces. Some seriously disturbing stuff in this movie. Great, inventive visuals.

Best Bit- Spider girl

 

18. The Untouchables

Brian De Palma’s action packed take on the prohibition era and Elliot Ness’ take down of Al Capone with the team he formed for the job. A hugely popular movie with an all star cast including De Niro, Sean Connery, Kevin Costner and more. My dad loved this movie so it got a few plays at our house in my youth. Even if you haven’t seen it I can guarantee you know a bunch of the quotes as they have been repeated in millions of things since.

Best Bit- Stairway shootout

 

17. A Better Tomorrow 2

Hot on the heels of the immense success of the original in it’s native Hong Kong, the sequel was rushed out but thankfully they managed to get John Woo to direct again. Due to the first movie being Chow Yun Fat’s breakout performance he was brought back as the twin of his original character as he was killed in the first one…..brilliant. a heroic bloodshed movie from the master of the genre.

Best Bit- Attack at the mansion

 

16. Raising Arizona

A black comedy from the Cohen brothers starring Nic Cage and Holly Hunter. One of Cage’s best performances in my opinion where his over the top and anarchic delivery is suited to the material as he plays a crazy criminal who falls in love and starts a relationship with the mug shot photographer who takes him in. Lots of craziness ensues.

Best Bit- Nappy shopping

 

15. Harry And The Hendersons

Ahhh that great Drew Struzan poster, so good. Released originally as Bigfoot And The Hendersons on my shores but later changed to it’s proper title. This fantasy comedy sees a family encountering and becoming friends with the Cryptozoic creature Sasquatch. The late Kevin Peter Hall who played the Predator plays the friendly creature. I used to cry at this movie which if you read these lists should come as no surprise. Fantastic creature effects from the legendary Rick Baker. It later got a tv series that I used to watch regularly.

Best Bit- The heart crushing end

 

14. Near Dark

Kathryn Bigelow’s “Hillbilly vampire” movie is beautifully shot with great, grimy aesthetics and is a hell of a lot of fun. It got lost in the shuffle with the much more popular Lost Boys in terms of vampire movies which is a shame as Near dark is almost as good.The late Bill Paxton in particular steals the show with his charismatic performance.

Best Bit- The ending

 

13. Masters Of The Universe

Ahhh a wonderfully terrible movie but I loved it so much as a kid and still get a hell of a lot of enjoyment out of it. Dolph Lundgren as He-Man is hilarious as he really wasn’t ready for a lead role in a mainstream movie like this and Frank Langella’s performance as Skeletor should have pissed all over his previous numerous achievements but it’s so endearing that it doesn’t. It’ a great watch with friends.

Best Bit- Final battle

 

12. Monster Squad

I didn’t know until doing my research that Shane Black co wrote this cult classic with Fred Dekker. Cool wee fact that, love Shane Black. The movie sees the universal monsters coming to life and a group of young kids trying to stop them from taking over the world. I mean, pitch me a film that kids would love more than that. Well, sensible kids should love it anyway it’s so much fun.

Best Bit- Frankie dies

 

11. The Lost Boys

A pop culture phenomenon when it was released, The Lost Boys has an ensemble cast of young stars and continued the vampire resurgence after Fright night a couple of years earlier. Two brothers (but wait there’s more) move into a new town and end up at odds with a gang of teen vampires. Joel Schumacher showed real promise with this one……yup.

Best Bit- Initiation

 

 

10. The Last Emperor

The real life tale of the final emperor of China Puyi who was a child when he first reigned….would probably do a better job than current leader in the world eh?….eh?….eh? Political humour from ya boy. An historical epic that shows his ascent to the throne and his later imprisonment by the Communist party. Bernardo Bertolucci’s direction is beautiful and won him the oscar.

Best Bit-The ceremony

 

9. The Running Man

Well done Arnie you pipped and oscar winner. I just love this movie it’s so god damned entertaining. An adaptation of the Stephen King (writing as Richard Bachman) novel of the same name directed by Paul Michael Glaser that sees a dystopian future in which the most popular tv show is like Gladiators but to the death. So much fun and it’s set in 2017….gutted that show isn’t out yet.

Best Bit- Buzzsaw fight

 

8. Lethal Weapon

The first in a very good series of movies directed by Richard Donner. A buddy cop film written by Shane Black who is the master of the genre with Mel Gibson and Danny Glover sharing tremendous chemistry. It was the first in the buddy cop genre that, in my opinion balanced true scary violence with the comedy parts and banter. There are some disturbing scenes in the first Lethal Weapon it’s not all smiles and laughs but there sure is a lot of fun in the movie too.

Best Bit- The dinner scene

 

7. The Brave Little Toaster

Yea boiiiii!. Hardly anyone I grew up with saw this movie which is tragic….and I don’t use that word lightly, it’s literally tragic. Anyway yea this sweet little animated movie follows a bunch of household appliances including Blanky who is one of the cutest characters in anything ever. They go off on an adventure to find the wee boy who lived in their house…..Toy Story basically ripped it off but most of the guys who made Toy Story also worked on this movie so it’s all good.

Best Bit- The junkyard

 

6. Hellraiser

Clive Barker directed this adaptation of his novella The Hellbound Heart from the wonderful Books Of Blood and it’s a corker. Despite Pinhead becoming something of a slasher icon this movie is far more intelligent and more subversive than a lot of slashers. It’s really not a slasher movie at all in any way so stop calling it one ok?!. Right now we’ve got that sorted the movie centres on a puzzle box that opens a portal to a hell like void with entities called cenobites who are the bringers of extreme pleasure through pain. Good gory stuff.

Best Bit- Jesus wept

 

5. Evil Dead 2: Dead By Dawn

Sam Raimi built upon his brilliant first movie with an even better sequel that took the gore further, the comedy was ramped up and the hi-octane nerve jangling scares. It’s just a blistering rollercoaster of splatterpunk goodness with Bruce Campbell cementing his place in horror legend as Ash, a character who has gone down as an all time movie great. Groovy.

Best Bit- Hand jive

 

4. Predator

Arnie in him pomp and back on the list. Most other years and it’d be up near the top but it’s a cracker of a year. A film of two halves really as it starts off as a standard action movie with humans firing at each other until Arnie and co find themselves stalked by an alien hunter. The musclebound group of soldiers are picked off one by one by the predator until Arnie finds a way to deal with him. A fantastic movie.

Best Bit- Billy calls out the predator

 

3. Full Metal Jacket

Stanley Kubrick’s stunning Vietnam war epic is brutal, powerful and deeply disturbing. Another movie of two halves as we see the development of the recruits as they prepare to be shipped off to fight and then later we see them thrown into the thick of action. Both parts are expertly dealt with by Kubrick and everyone who has seen it will struggle to forget Vincent D’ Onofrio’s portrayal of Private Pyle and his descent into madness due to the bullying he receives. It’s heartbreaking. Then we see these characters we’ve grown to like get sent off into a foreign land and see how woefully under prepared they were for what was to come. Then there’s R Lee Emrey’s career defining performance. A masterpiece…..It’s also got Dorian Harewood of Biker Mice From Mars fame in it, bonus!.

Best Bit- Pyle snaps

 

2. A Nightmare On Elm Street Part 3: The Dream Warriors

A legendary poster for a legendary movie. A lot of people struggle between this one and the original for their favourite movie in the Elm Street franchise and it’s hard to decide because they are completely different styles of movies. Part one is taught, tense and mysterious whilst this one is more aimed at the MTV crowd with a lot of fantasy, fun elements and a wise cracking Freddy thrown in. This one isn’t as scary as the original but it’s more fun. It just depends what you prefer really. This one sees a group of kids in a psychiatric ward banding together to control their dreams and take on Freddy. Some of the best kills in the series come from this one.

Best Bit- Like a puppet on a string

 

1 Robocop

A cyberpunk masterpiece of social satire, extreme violence and one of the most memorable main characters in any movie. I remember absolutely obsessing over this movie as it sat in my neighbour’s house staring at me. I would ask my folks over and over if I could watch it but it was 18 rated so no chance as I was only around 7 at the time. I would rent the cartoon series (unbelievable that it was made) until eventually they gave in and let me watch it. My first 18 rated movie and it’s still one of the most violent ever haha. Paul Verhoeven absolutely nailed everything he was going for in this gritty, violent, funny sci fi classic.

Best Bit- “What’s your name son?”

 

What a brilliant year 1987 was. Let’s hope for more of the same in 1988. Join me back here for that lis and until then be coo and catch me @swing_kinker XX

 

 

 

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